I regret I didn't let him take more naps or let him get stupid tattoos he wanted. I wish he had told me he wanted the new mountain bike he bought behind my back instead of hustling a way to get it without me knowing. I would have kicked.his.ass. for that. Like, filed divorce papers (it was a VERY expensive bike). But I didn't find out until he was gone. He never even got to ride it.
Anyway, I guess the reason I am putting this in black and white and calling myself out is because I know I am not alone. I know there are so many wives reading this who do the SAME thing. Husbands, too! Because it is just human nature to fuss at the one who you love the most. You may even hear yourself doing it but you can't stop yourself. Because, dammit, you wanna be right. But I'm here to tell you, it's not worth it. Do not let the stresses of life affect you to the point that you feel you have to just get out of each other's way. Don't take life so seriously... It's not like you're gonna make it out alive.
I have a new perspective now and I am using my reflections to make myself into a better person to have on your team, to share life with, to JUST BE with. I have learned my lesson. No longer will I complain before I make attempts to fix things myself. I will be the woman I have wanted to be. I still want to be treated like the only girl in the world, but I will do the same in return for someone special, including my kids, friends and family. Don't get me wrong, Jason was far from mistreated, and we had a good and happy marriage. But there is always room for improvement, isn't there? And now I have all the time in the world to think of how I could have done certain things differently.
So today I challenge you to examine yourself and make a list of the things you maybe aren't delivering in your relationship. Next, hide that list somewhere he/she won't ever find it. I'm not totally crazy, don't show your spouse/partner!! Too much ammo there. Then, work on it BY YOURSELF first. Rome wasn't built in a day. It won't happen overnight. But really examine your mindset and see what your part is. Be who you want to be with. Make this count. Go watch a sunset, because you never know when you'll be out of them.
Pull the stick out,